


Rain Outside of Oregon

by Marasa



Series: Dynamic Stretching [15]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Overthinking, Restlessness, Soft Boys, protective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-07 04:27:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13426797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marasa/pseuds/Marasa
Summary: Just outside of Oregon, Josh decides he is unneeded.





	Rain Outside of Oregon

Just outside of Oregon, Josh decides he is unneeded.

Thoughts like this usually happen on days that they are confined on the tour bus for more than eight hours. Something about the enclosed space has him facing his own insecurities and problems, pulling him into his own head.

Rain hits the window as they drive down the highway and Josh can't stop thinking about how disposable he is.

It doesn't matter that Tyler tattooed his own name on him or how Josh had written his own name permanently on Tyler- Tyler doesn't need him.

This is Tyler’s dream, and Josh thinks that he's forgotten the insignificant role he plays in a genius idea he himself could never pull off.

Josh is cheap. He is replaceable. He is a tool that is the same as a million others.

Anyone could do his job. A computer could do it, and even then, it would do it better than he ever could.

They've been on the bus for eleven hours and the rain isn't helping.

Josh is sitting on the couch in the lounge, hanging his head down in front of him. His elbows rest in his thighs, his knuckles dig harshly into his temples. His legs bounce wildly.

“Josh?”

He's so deep in his own self-loathing, Josh almost forgot that Tyler is sitting on the small couch across from him. He had been trying to write but from what Josh can see, he's just been doodling for the past hour.

Josh gives him a quick glance, shooting him a tiny, forced smile before looking back down at the ground again.

Tyler puts his notebook and pen on the table beside him and Josh wonders if he’ll cry when Tyler officially kicks him out of the band.

It's all a joke, but Josh just knows it's coming. Maybe when Tyler kicks him out, he’ll say, ‘ _I_   _did warn you, didn't I_?’

This is the time where Tyler usually asks him if he's okay, and Josh will always lie and say that of course he is.

He can't manage it today; he'd fall apart if Tyler asks.

Josh bounces his legs harder as he waits for the question that will tear him apart.

It doesn’t come.

Instead, a soft voice reaches out for him so gently that it has Josh’s nerves calming for only a moment.

“Come here, Josh,” Tyler beckons softly, carefully.

“It's fine.” Josh tries to seem unaffected and strong. “I'm fine, Ty.”

“Josh, c’mere,” Tyler calls again and this time it's even softer, if that's even possible.

It's not a demand, simply a request, a soft reminder that he's there for him with open arms always.

Josh tries to resist the temptation to just fall apart and weep his doubt and self-loathing against him but he finds himself rising to his legs before he can lie further to himself.

He shuffles to the other side of the bus with his head and eyes down. He sits down on the couch a considerable distance away from Tyler and stays completely frozen.

There's a pause of Tyler patiently waiting him out, but when Josh makes no move to get closer or even look up, Tyler slides in closer to him.

“Josh,” Tyler whispers, fingers stroking his knee to keep it still when it threatens to start up the intense bouncing again. “What's going on?”

Josh opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. As soon as his eyes well up with tears, Tyler’s arms are around him, holding him.

There are no words, just a hand in his hair and a protective arm wrapped around his back. Josh buries his face in Tyler’s neck and breathes shuddered breath against him.

“Tell me what's going on Josh,” Tyler says gently, fingers threaded into the pink hair of the back of his head. “I don't want you hurting like this.”

“You don't need me,” Josh whispers against him. If sounds broken and small. “I’m nothing.”

Tyler holds him tighter without realizing it.

“You are so much, Josh.” Tyler nestles the bridge of his nose against the shorter, brunette hair on the side of his head. “You are so talented. You are so hardworking. You understand me and accept me for who I am; I can be myself around you and that's all because of the beautiful person you are.”

Tyler presses a kiss to his sore temple. “You are loved, Josh. You are so, so loved. And there could be no one else that could do what you do. I love you.”

Josh melts into his embrace, breath shaky and arms wrapped around the other man.

“Th-Thank you,” Josh murmurs and Tyler answers with a non-stop chant of, ‘ _You are loved, you are loved, I love you, Joshua, you are needed, you are so loved.’_

Josh loses himself in the comfort the other provides, eyelids drooping and fingers holding tighter. The path of the tour bus to their next stop lulls him. The sound of rain against the window soothes his demons.

Josh falls asleep in Tyler’s arms and finds that there is no better place to ever fall asleep.


End file.
